Every day I realize that we are one day closer to leaving. We do not have a leave date. We do not have anywhere close to the support needed to leave.  And yet, I find myself thinking about what it will be like to leave almost everyday.  I am very excited about going to Singapore. I’m very excited about what God has for us in Asia and how He will use us in His work to bring people to Himself.  I’m very excited about the work that is going on in Asia-Pacific and all the people who are coming to Christ through the work there.  And because of all that, I really want to go.  I want to go to take the Gospel to the hurt, broken, lost people of Asia.  Yet I don’t want to leave.  I don’t want to leave my friends, my family, my home (even if it is a rented townhouse).  I especially don’t want to leave our church, which is full of our friends, has become a family to us, and always feels like home. 

We came back from Discovery in April knowing that we were going to accept the offer made to us to be missionaries with HCJB Global.  Ever since then every single time I go to church, especially for services, I think about the fact that one day not too far from now will be the last time we got to service there. Sure, we’ll be back on furlough and go to our church then, but it won’t be the same.  And yes, God will provide a great church for us in Singapore that will hopefully become like our church, but that doesn’t make it any easier to leave our church. 

So here I am, knowing that God has called us and knowing that I really do want to go and also feeling like I don’t want to leave knowing that when we come back, everything will have changed.